The only disability in life is a bad attitude.
- Scott Hamilton

I have people tell me all the time that I'm "dealing with this so well"...I honestly have no clue what that means?? I am dealing with 'this' the only way I know how to deal with it...by being me.

Yes, life sits on the edge of total suckage these days. I never know if I'll be able to get out of bed in the morning, if I'll have to sit in urgent care for hours, if I will have the energy to make lunch for the kids, or if I will have a migraine that is so bad I want to rip my kid's vocal chords out....

One of the greatest things we have in this life is our free agency. There are days when I will tell you that I think free agency is crap, but most of the time I'm grateful for it. I have my agency, every day, to decide if I'm going to make the best of that day or not. I could mope around the house (and believe me sometimes I do) or i can be happy with what I do have.

I have a home. I have AMAZING kids. Heck, I'm sitting in a gorgeous house in one of the most beautiful places in the world. I have awesome parents. I have PHENOMENAL friends. I have a wonderful team of doctors working to make me well again. I have the ability to pull of the bald look! Life isn't that bad!!!

I spent a lot of time today pondering life, the meaning of the events the happen in our life, and the way the Lord shows His hand in our life. Things happen, people come and go, lessons are learned (or re-learned), and life moves on. We can accept what happens to us and learn from it, or we can get upset and say that life isn't fair.

Am I glad I have cancer? Oh heck no! I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. But, there is meaning in this trial for me. I was handed this trial because I need to learn something from it...something that maybe only cancer could teach me. Do I know what that is? I'm not sure yet, but I think it got a bit more clear today.....

When I figure it out for sure, you'll be the first to know ;)